Cloudy with a chance of broken

Apple’s WWDC is upon us and Apple nerds are like children the days before Christmas, fantasizing about new toys. It’s heartwarming in a reality-challenged kind of way.

As you know if you’ve been reading this blog for any amount of time, I’m all-in on the Apple ecosystem—Macs, iPhone, iPad. Which means I’m all-in on something that doesn’t effing work.

All the devices by themselves are great and let me do pretty much everything I want with a minimum of fuss and muss, so yay for that. But it all goes off the rails with syncing.

Add a new contact on the Mac and expect it to show up on my phone? Maybe. At some point.

Create a new bookmark—for Heaven’s sake—in Safari on my Mac and expect it to show up on my iPad? That’s a negatory, ghost rider.

Add a reminder to make a very important phone call on my iPad at home and expect it to show up on my Mac at work? Eh, perhaps.

Get a message in Messages and expect it to show up on both my phone and my Mac? It could happen. Sometimes. And sometimes the phone just doesn’t get the message at all. Because, meh.

This shit is infuriating. And yes, I know, I know, first-world problems, but dammit I live in the first world and pay through the nose for these devices so I’d like them to do what it says on the tin.

It’s possible something has gotten wedged in my particular iCloud instance and that’s why all this is happening, but, and let’s take this one slow since it’s very important: I have no way to troubleshoot or fix it.

Which is probably the most infuriating thing of all: Being stuck at the mercy of cloud elves who are clearly off on a crack bender somewhere.

So all I really want for WWDC is for somebody to get up on stage and say, “We fixed iCloud. It works now.” And of course then for it to actually work.

A pony would be nice, too.